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Sunday, December 22, 2013

Everyone knows it's....

The weather here in North Alabamastan was dreadful last night, so much so that the gusts blew the pixels or digits or bits or bytes all over the place, and rendered local broadcast digital TV...digitised. As such I did not do the Saturday night MeTV blog.

I did, however, go into the rain and shore up the corner of our front porch which became suddenly unsupported, like a clueless PR Twitterer making a tasteless Aids/Africa joke. From my Facebook:

We have a weather-related problem, he said breaking his silence. A rather weighty easel was blown off the porch, taking one of the corner columns with it. We have managed to replace the column at an angle to maintain a level of support for the porch roof, but if anyone has a jack and timber whereby we can lift the corner enough to reset the column, we could use your help, Sunday afternoon or Monday. The sooner the better. I would prefer the front of the house not to look like it has a Murphy porch. Know-how is also a plus!

Here is the follow-up:

Just finished it. Our preacher had a railroad jack, my biz neighbor had a piece of timber. Four of us insured there were no surprises. I cut the timber, we set the jack, raised the porch corner (the sag was surprising), two guys supported the column, and I lowered the jack, gingerly. A settling groan, and the column was again doing the job! Thanks to Noel Hardy, Taylor Morris, Erick Chaney, Greg Legg, Gary Compton, and mine own engineering genius. Next project: building a ground-to-orbit elevator from PVC pipe and solar cells.

So there we go. A 70 degree stormy bluster tried to take out our porch. We prevailed. And all without a Licensed Duck Call.

How do we do it?


Michael W said...

"How do we do it?"

Well don't look at me. Genuine wintry weather continually fails to penetrate the force field set up around southeastern South Carolina.

Rigel Kent said...

The weather here in North Alabamastan was dreadful last night

You know the weather I had last night? Ice rain. Not snow, which is bad enough. But ice rain.

This made travel simply more fun than should be allowed by law. And while my power didn't go out due to downed lines, I know people whose power did go out.

(Note: Never try to compete with someone from the Midwest when it comes to bad weather stories. Unless you're from a part of the country that has hurricanes.)

Doom said...

I think ice rain wins for losing, though the porch thing... if that is slightly different, but manageable with genius and elbow grease. You did remember the elbow grease, right?

Double barreled 4"ers of snow, plus another inch to tamp down any notion that after removing the above, that we were in any way ahead of the game, or probably will be this winter. Lucy and that stinking ball pull trick, I tell you.

The four tales of woe and weather. Although I like winter, I think you ought to be careful with your lament, Michael. Whispered into the right, or wrong, ear... snow shoes... all I'm saying there. :p

Michael W said...

@Doom --- you kidding? I want snow! Bring it on! Big arctic drifts! Frozen wastelands! I put up with twenty years of living in the humidity of Houston, and now this South Carolina climate is driving me frickin' nuts. Bring on the glacier!

The Aardvark said...

@Rigel- Ice rain is fun. Here in our neck the horrors are less the weather, and more people's reaction thereto. Folks around here swerve to miss a snowflake.

Naaah, I see your ice rain and raise you an "I drove home from Louisiana on the wings of Katrina, slaloming around whole trees in the roadway."

Prepares to collect his winnings.

Rigel Kent said...

"I drove home from Louisiana on the wings of Katrina, slaloming around whole trees in the roadway."

Prepares to collect his winnings.

Not so quickly. I did already mention the hurricane exception to my little rule, but try this one on for size.

A few years agoi I was working in direct sales. Meaning I went into people's homes to demonstrate, and of course sell, products. I did it all over the lower peninsula. So one day the office gives me an appointment in a nearby county.

Not too bad distance wise, less than an hour by the freeway. Except that part of the state was facing a torrential downpour with powerful winds.

Did I mention that the windshield wipers on my truck did not work? In these rains all I could see out of my windshield was a big blur that was mighty short on details.

I could of course beg off the demo (that's what we called our sales appointments), there wouldn't be any sort of penalty. But of course there also wouldn't be any pay either. So off I went.

Driving 70 mph+ down the freeway having to guess at the blurs in front of me, and which exit to get off at since I couldn't read the signs.

I didn't do too bad. The first time I get off the freeway to see where I was at, it turns out I'd gotten off just one exit early. So I hopped back on and got to the appointment right on time.

Of course the people weren't home, but that's how it is sometimes. I still considered it a moral victory.

The Aardvark said...

Kirby or Rainbow?

Rigel Kent said...

Rainbow. Which was thematically appropriate at least.

The Aardvark said...

Rigel, you have no idea how much I hoped it was Rainbow!

I used to flog Kirby meself. I have a Dyson now. Best suck-bucket I ever had!

Katrina, Rigel.


(I think that this is somehow the meteorological version of Argument from Authority.)

Rigel Kent said...

Katrina, Rigel.


(I think that this is somehow the meteorological version of Argument from Authority.)

Yes it is, which is why I'm not willing to let it stand without any challenge at all. My counter example was not given in an attempt to claim the weather conditions themselves were worse, obviously they weren't, Katrina was a hurricane after all.

I'm saying the circumstances that I had to deal with (having to in essence drive blind) while facing the storm were worse.

This is a door you opened when mentioning that in your neck of the woods it's not the weather, but people's reactions to it that caused problems.

In my situation it was my vehicle's limitations that caused the problems traveling in bad weather.

But having made my argument, so to speak, I'm more than happy to let the judges decided. Whoever they are, whether real or simply imagined inside my delusional mind.