Old Time Radio at OTRCat!

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Send three boxtops and 25 cents in coin to....




http://l3.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/.woeSSgIRFeesvPB3ytEdA--/YXBwaWQ9eW5ld3M7cT04NTt3PTMwMA--/http://media.zenfs.com/en-US/blogs/games-us-unplugged/subtoy_300x141.jpg




The Aardvark loves and APPRECIATES his customers from all over the Western Spiral Arm of the galaxy. He would be unable to buy toys and oatmeal for the 'varklets without you. One thing puzzles him.

Why the need for all the handholding during online transactions? In his yout', the Aardvark would order Fun Things from the back of cereal boxes, f'rinstance. He would fill out the form, address and stamp the envelope, include the twelve boxtops and the requisite moolah. The post would take it away, and 6-8 weeks later, the wondrous toy would arrive. No-one called me to say "This is Kellogg's, and we got your order to-day! We have opened the envelope.". Or a week later, "This is Kellogg's again, we have processed your order, and will put it in the box in ten days. We shall mail it two Mondays hence.".

Like that.

There seems to be a neurotic assumption that EVERY business online is just out to GET you, that swindling is in the air, and that a spotless record on eBay, say, means absolutely nothing. Back in the mail-order days of the Fifties and Sixties, we cast our bread on the commercial waters, and our goodies would return Parcel Post. No worries, other than the delicious anticipation. Six weeks? We were ecstatic to get the thing.

What has happened?

11 comments:

Doom said...

Amazon? It spoils. I get a confirmation email, then an email telling me when the package is on the way plus a link (usually) to check the progress of the package. Usually I ignore all of this, save when it is a last minute buy for a trip or such. But... that might explain what you are running into.

Michael W said...

@Aardvark -- What has happened?

My guess? The combination of a rising cynicism mixed with a society way too fond of litigation.

Jay said...

Your DVD order, My Little Pony: Godzilla vs Rainbow Dash has just been received!

Your DVD order, My Little Pony: Godzilla vs Rainbow Dash has just been shipped!

Your DVD order, My Little Pony: Godzilla vs Rainbow Dash has just been been lost in the shuffle!

Preorder your DVD copy, My Little Pony Glue Factories Are Murder, NOW!

Michael W said...

@Jay --- followed by "Soylent Green are My Little Ponies!"

The Aardvark said...

I SO want "My Little Pony Glue Factories Are Murder"!!!

Doom said...

And you guys think I am... dangerous or odd or such. Ha!

I am, however, taking notes.

"My Little Pony Glue Factories Are Murder!!!" *scribbles*

The Aardvark said...

No, Doom...you fit in JUST fine!!

Unknown said...

Awright, which one of you dogs done it? Oh, don't flash those blinkies on me, I know someone in this room... got busy wit da pony. To the glue factory? Fine, for those of you who may not be in on it or in teh know, here is the link...

World's smallest pony abducted.

Doom said...

Me, above, too. Darned having two sign in things. Bleh.

Doom said...

Woot! Aardvark says I fit in fine! So there!

Jay said...

@Michael--- I definitely would get "Soylent Pony".

Sponsored by PETA -People Eating Tasty Animals.