Old Time Radio at OTRCat!

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Adversity in Advertising





My ad hoc product photos of the java that Friend Fred got for us reminds me of my intro into the truth of advertising.
Note I did not say "truth IN advertising".
The fall of 1977, after the Dread Dormomoo and I were wed, I found myself in need of A Situation. Mind you, this was early in the Carter Years, and the economy was already on a downturn. I found work as a photographer for a local NC variety store chain, both in-store family portraits, and the home-office product photographer, where I used a Polaroid back on a view camera. I took shots of the various specials featured in their newspaper adverts. Toys, paper towels, kitchen gadgets, all fell under the baleful eye of my apparatus.
Though I was considerably wet-behind-the-ears, I fell into the routine and style fairly easily, and my boss, Charley Sauls, kept feeding me product. Came the week when we featured towels and washcloths, and I felt I was ready for anything!
The store, "Wood's" was, again, a small regional discount concern, like a Dollar General without the charm. You could buy errr, inexpensive items there. Almost all was of US manufacture, but often it would be the "cheap" line, or even seconds. Caveat emptor.
So it was with the towel line. The washcloths were thin, almost see-through, but I dutifully folded them, stacked them (the store motto was "We stack it high, and sell it low!") and took the shot.


When "Cholley" saw the photo later, he took me aside and gently admonished that it was insufficient, and so went to the studio with me to show what must be done. See, I had taken the washcloths, folded each, and stacked them for a 3/4 shot. He took the cloths, and folded TWO together, then, two more, and two more, and again, until we had a fat stack of terrycloth fabrication, turned with the fold toward the camera (I had gotten THAT right). He took note of my moral discomfiture at the fraud, and said "We're not being dishonest; we just want them to look as good as they are.Thick and thirsty!"


Apparently terrycloth loses ten pounds when photographed.
I was not long for that particular gig. I continued with the portrait work, and learned much of how not to raise children, but those tales are for another time.

Wednesday, March 18, 2020

A washboard for wasabi



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I might be happier if sci fi writers and actors could get "silicon" and "silicone" straight.

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West Chester, PA has a phone line to report businesses that are open but shouldn't be.

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Surprising how a teeny virus is big enough to make people surrender constitutional rights to government fiat.

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More importantly, who really thought 2 follow-ups of FLCL were required?
I suspect Federal complicity.

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Just realised this:
"Privilege" is a post-modern, Godless
term for "blessing".

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When I was a kid, I attended a few funerals. The pallbearers would each have a red rose in their lapel.
I have been a pallbearer twice. We were given an adhesive embroidered rose for our lapels.

Postmodern form over substance.
Hateful. If my pallbearers have stickers, I will haunt you all.

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Learn to prepare.
The TP madness shows how bad it could get given a REAL catastrophe.

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Has the CDC issued new info?
As I drove to the store, it was apparent that they believe if you drive SLOW,
you won't catch C.-19

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Best line in awhile:
"I've got a date with destiny, and it
ain't gonna end with a kiss!"
(Candace from "Phineas and Ferb")

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Having a genuine need to watch
"The Andromeda Strain".

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This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang, but a wheeze.

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"Prepping" means having stuff ready in case there is An Event, not rushing and panic-buying after the thing.

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"Earn cash on the fly by reporting illegal business software today."
'Cos you can't possibly lose your job when we descend like locusts on your place of employment.

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The panic of people following Covid19 cases
approaching their state
is like watching
a snail collision.

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Been watching the late Eighties
"Superboy" series.
Gilbert Gottfried's "Nick Knack"
may be the best villain.

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A peeve?
When people unwittingly share
incorrect info, then say
"I lied".

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Funny things I've heard:
"If I get Corona virus, I also want Lyme disease, 'cos I love Corona with lime."

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Seems to me that all the media-inspired worry would have a deleterious effect on immune response.

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I have mused on the usefulness
of Cracker Barrel Restaurants in case of
The Zombie Apocalypse.

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Just got back from a GRUELING voice session for
"Scared Shirtless", the horror podcast I'm in.
VERY taut.

https://scaredshirtlesstees.podbean.com/

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If we get Bernie in as Prexy,
he'll have all those FEMA camps for Insta-Gulags!

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Mike Johnson - 17 February 2014 at 22:33

Sarcasm is like a good game of chess... Most people don't know how to play chess.

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If Christians were as persistent as the Google Business scammers, the entire world would be evangelised.

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Original BSG, and Buck Rogers,
some of the worst SF shows EVER,
and I've seen Space:1999!

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The Dread Dormomoo and I attended the last "Anime South" convention (I think in 2014).

Whilst there, I was at the hotel lobby coffee stand getting some much-needed java. As I was doing the thing, I dropped the creamer cup in my coffee cup. "Herp derp" sez I.

The sweet young con attendee next to me looked in wonder and said "Don't take this the wrong way...I've never heard someone your age say 'Herp derp' before".

It pays to be culture-savvy.

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Missing when they said
HEElicopter
and the program after Mercury
was called Geminee.

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Kazik!

That is all.

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Later.

Monday, November 18, 2019

Why the Left cannot meme.


No photo description available.

Your Aardvark has had the smackdown put on him. The kibosh, even.
I had shared this latest knee-slapper of Jeffrey Epstein memes (best one yet):

No photo description available.

and a friend posted the tweet at the top in response.

Well, of COURSE!
This is the point. The EXACT point. The "Jeffrey Epstein didn't kill himself"
 memes exist precisely because whatever happened to him, he has now avoided (temporal) judgment, and what is worse (as fellow huckster Jesse Forte commented on FB), all of those who partook of Epstein's...services and offerings...have escaped exposure and judicial punishment.

This brings up the titular issue: the Left cannot meme effectively, primarily because They Don't Get It. Memes require Pith and Editing. The Left tends toward preachments and verbosity. Also, they apparently cannot see through to the raison d'etre of the meme in the first place. It merely becomes a springboard for clueless responses.

If Epstein offed himself, well, he took the coward's path of avoidance.
If he was offed by others, they were protecting themselves from their loathsomeness being revealed and punished.

I vote that Epstein didn't kill himself.
(Thanks, fRed, for the meme!)





















Saturday, October 19, 2019

A velocipede of volubility



SAKES, fan types.
It's "Aeolus 14 Umbra"!

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How Religion Works: If I obey, then God will love and accept me.
The Gospel: I'm loved and accepted, therefore I wish to obey.
--Thomas Keller

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John Tracy is
hikikomori

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I can neither confirm nor deny that Herb McCaulla, Wes Tillander, and I invented Southern Fandom so we could make a buck off of 'em.

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"I don't intend copyright infringement" is perhaps not the most ironclad of legal boilerplate.

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The President reflects society
that has rejected
morals and niceties of the past.
If Orange Man Bad, then So Are We.

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Got to hang out some with
George Lowe at FanatiCon in Dothan, AL.
(Remember "Space Ghost Coast to Coast?", when Cartoon Network was funny?)

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If you are not a Jew,
then you are a Gentile.
This seems simple.

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Image may contain: food

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https://principia-scientific.org/chemistry-expert-carbon-dioxide-cant-cause-global-warming/?fbclid=IwAR2Um52Rh9aqF0eg614_d7rurO2cszRbW2OBvcet-TeVfsUiBN4frqArIrg

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Politics is now a giant
bloody game of UNO.
But if you play the UNDO card,
your opponent can on the next turn.

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The word is NOT
"whistleblower".
The correct term is
"tattletale".

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HOT TAKE:

Quantum computers use
TIMECUBE



https://tinyurl.com/yxajbual

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I'd use Alexa if the voice was
Brian Blessed's.

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I heard a thing.
I will believe it because it agrees with my other things.
I want to believe the thing.

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WVNN (local talk station),
must you field local hosts
who sound like poster children for
terminal adenoiditis?

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It is pitch black.
You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

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The gospel of Jesus Christ is far more transformative than
the ballot box.

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Benjy, if the American people do not want to occupy, why have bases everywhere?
Perhaps D.C. should hear the people.

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The Events (09/20)
---------------
Wednesday afternoon, I began to experience chest pain.
*pauses for collective gasp*
It was, however a Very Specific and Familiar chest pain.
"When your Aardvark has pollen-impacted sinuses, or the galloping bronchitis, or has his arm yaw when it should have pitched whilst carrying a heavy piece of equipment, he goes to a local clinic, where he pays cash, either then, or in thirty days.
He is often prescribed pharmaceuticals, and more often than not, at least part of the scrip is in the form of free samples of the drug. When he thought he was having a heart Event at an out-of-town convention, the pain eased, and we (perhaps foolishly) drove back to AL. Upon arriving home, to the local clinic he went, fast as he could caper. The nurse practitioner did an EKG, then asked about insurance. None. He went "Whoops" or somesuch, trundled the EKG out, and pretended he had not run the test, which had shown normal. Finally after much pokery and proddery, he put his palms on your hero's breastbone, and all but did a handstand. "Did it feel like this?" "Yessss" came the reply. Turns out the 'varky sternum had been strained from overmuch t-shirt printing, and himself was told to lay off for awhile. Your Aardvark was treated, and well, and paid in cash."
It was THAT pain, but multiplied since ten years ago. Apparently the inflammation has increased of late. Enough that by Wednesday night, it was almost to whimpering level. There were none of the concomitant symptoms for a heart attack, but if we pressed on my sternum, it hurt like blazes.
I went to sleep, hugging a hard foam pillow, which surprisingly helped. Thursday morning, the overt pain was almost gone, but was still touchy, and my energy level dropped to zero. I slept most of the day...did not FEEL like leaving the house to go to the doc.
Today, The DD and I took me to Urgent Care doc-in-the-box. One of the kids recommended it. WELL worth the experience. They have a flat fee of $175, which includes all tests. I had an ECG (when did it stop being EKG?), blood screening and thorough consultation.
The ECG was peachy, though my pulse rate was 102 BPM, which appears to be normal for my bloodline. But that is what signaled the need for the blood screening. Coupla more days and I'll hear from that.
I am frightfully pleased with all hands there. Friendly, willing to actually TELL you things, and also willing to listen. I told them of the sternum tale...I agreed to the ECG because I am not stupid, and I was happy that as far as that went, my self-diagnosis was correct.
The upshot is, that I DID see the doc, on the chance that I in my questionable wisdom may have missed something. (Eric Arbuckle, you may upbraid me at your leisure.)
No heart attack. YAAAAYY! Lots of pain, that has largely worn off. We'll see what else. OH! High BP, for which I have a 'scrip, and instructions to cool it with the third shift thing, because sleep issues can cause OTHER issues.
So, we shall see. Thank you for concern and prayers.

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Forget straws.
Silicone wristbands
will be the death of the Earth.

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"Pumpkin spice" references are NOT
a cry for a "Dune" quote.

A cry for help, yes....

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Tickety-boo!

Thursday, June 27, 2019

A Tally of Tumtwaddle

From 2015:

Dear conservatives and Constitutionalists:
This has been an interesting week, in the Chinese sense. Many are kvetching that it is the end of our economy, others are whining "Come, Lord Jesus" over the preponderance of rainbows online (I hold firm with the prayer for the Lord's return, but not as whinging over political downturns. The hymn does NOT say "Whine Up O Men of God....). There is a vast cataract of bloviation on one side, and mean-spirited poor winners on the other.
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
What we have seen is a result of a vast stratagem, that of Wearing Down the Opposition. For close to fifty years, the homosexual lobby has worked tactical magic day-to-day, from making Christians look silly by ignoring Biblical context, to having VERY sympathetic and likeable characters on TV shows, to marching their brand constantly before the watching world.
They have lived and put forth supreme effort for their beliefs and lifestyle.
Because of this, 1.5-2% of the population has popularised what used to the sin that has no name by turning it to something akin to civic virtue, and by demanding not mere acceptance, no, but celebration and rights for what has never existed before in 5000 years of history, homosexual marriage being equivalent legally and socially to what Jesus defined as "a man shall leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife". (see, Jesus DID talk about it, too!) In doing that they also accrued a large base of supporters, because if you DON'T agree, they will call you made-up names in public. That would be uncool, and you would likely not be invited to the best parties.
How was this accomplished? By unflagging effort to reach the goal.
Dear conservatives, Christians, and Constitutionalists, they BELIEVED, then ACTED unyieldingly to accomplish their tasks. Were we as convinced in our own concerns, we would have stormed cities, state capitols, the very Capitol in D.C., and demanded that those who purport to represent us DO SO. Those who are treasonous would have been arrested, and we would have brought about a renascence of our Constitutional Republic. This is a truth I speak, and you had best hear it. Why did we not fill the streets of D.C.? Why did we not clog the halls of Congress with our demands? Were we so busy that we could not get away? Busy with what? Franklin said that the Founders gave us a Republic, if we could keep it. Was the second car, the bass boat, the vacation so important that we could not be BOTHERED to take back our country?
By all means, let us moan, weep, gnash our teeth, and NOW call on the Almighty to get us out of this mess. OUR mess, for had we the will our fellow citizens had for their interests, we would have won the day by sheer force of numbers. But no, social media, talk radio, "conservative news", all were enough, we thought, we hoped. Someone else will do the heavy lifting. Last year a retired Army guy tried to organise a peaceful siege of Washington D.C. Few could be bothered, and it fizzled.
"Maybe God is judging Amurrica!" Stop blaming the Almighty for our own almighty sorriness. And as I point my finger of indignation, I am cognizant that three are aimed at me. Nothing short of a revolution will change things, now. I question if we are man enough to even begin to consider thinking about the possibility of debating the need to talk about forming a committee to establish the by-laws for drafting a plan such as we would need.
We have been weighed in the balance, and found sorely wanting. "How can he say this?"
Because we have repeatedly and overwhelmingly lost. Behold the new force in American politics: The Loser Majority.
Here endeth the lesson.

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From 2016

The planet's inhabitants have survived well for many millennia as clans, tribes, and nation-states. No globalist pretensions, except once, and the kibosh was put on that, giving Berlitz a career.
The frantic flailing over BREXIT shows that some never learn. Globalism, UN hegemony, internationalist cabals, whichever buzzword suits, is nothing more than a political-economic Babel, which, given humankind's predilection to fussing, is destined to fragment anyway. Power and profits for those at the top will not be sufficient to maintain the solidarity of the masses. National sovereignty may be as ingrained as eye color, and reversion to it will come, sooner rather than later.

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JUST SAYIN'....

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A little late.
"Good Omens".
It's a FANTASY. People learning to treat each other kindly.
By all means, hyperventilate.

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Star Trek: Discovery.

And I thought the Excelsior
was ugly!

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Dear, dear Chuck Schumer.
You are fretting over voting security.
Here ya go:
Voter ID.

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No photo description available.

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BEDELIA!
WHERE'S MY FATHERS DAY CAKE?!

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Tickety Boo!

Saturday, March 16, 2019

A Plethora of Pith



I miss the time when the world was more innocent.

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I notice that no one is sighing wistfully for someone to remake
"The Green Slime".


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Fajitas seasoned too little
taste like horse,
at least to my imagination.


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Really missing the '70s
fish & chips places like
Cedric's and Arthur Treacher's.


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All the people who freak out over
"DANGEROUS TOYS" from mid-century...
There were no radioactive Jarts,
so it's all cool.


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Amusing that some who give
no thought to following Christ
are flailing over the Trump
signed Bible thing.

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Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, food

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No photo description available.

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I do NOT care if it funds toys for orphans.
That men see that you buy a house, and say "We will charge you money for the privilege, and if you do not pay us, we will take your house." is an unremitting evil.
It is certainly not Liberty.

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1955 cutoff?
1963 cutoff?
I don't know if I'm a Boomer or not!
I would love to be GenX and hate on the Boomers, too!

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Whatever other deficiencies I may have, I have never taken a selfie.

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The John Birchers were right, as was Joe McCarthy.

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TFW watching the first Titan missile launch brings tears to your eyes.

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One of the great losses of Western Civilisation is that Orson Welles never did a recorded reading of the King James Bible.
The out-takes alone....

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You realise that a REAL
Hawaiian pizza
would be
Pineapple and SPAM

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Facebook is the talk radio
of the 21st Century.

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Be prepared.
If you voted for Mr. Trump,
then Jerrold Nadler will likely subpoena YOU, too!

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Image may contain: 1 person, text

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Socialism is not
"Communism Lite".
It is the Communism Lie.

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In a few hundred years, the new seedlings will be old-growth.

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TTFN!