Bird was NOT the word

Your Aardvark his own self


I was listening to the radio the other day, and  heard a neologism. Now, I am not above playing Humpty Dumpty with the Mother Tongue meself, but come ON.... The word I heard was in an advert, and was clearly coined to make a silly activity sound Cool, and With It. The ad was extolling the virtues of the E-Cigarette, that little poser stick that is the adult version of sugar fags. You can "smoke" indoors, because it's not smoke! It is flavored water vapor with a nicotine kick. No tars or second-hand smoke to get in the way of fluoride and aspartame killing us. The "coal" on the tip is usually not red or orange, but rather blue and glow-ey.


 



This has the appearance of not being really committed to one's vice. "Oh, I'll do it, but in a way that little old ladies and leftist smoke-Nazis (ooooh, I repeated myself) will leave me alone about.". (I dunno...increasing heated water vapor content in the atmosphere...since the planet acts exactly  like a glass-roofed hothouse, there will likely be Consequences, like glaciers melting and polar bears marrying penguins.)

"Vape-ing". Or "vaping".

What a milquetoast term. (mercy, I sound like a blogger from the 1920s. What did they call them, editorialists?) But Vaping? The seventh graders will NOT be all "let's go behind the gym and vape.".
Nosirree,sir.

Vape-ing. Trying to make a weenie activity into a Popular and Hip one.  Perhaps that should be the true definition. Vaping, the smoker's equivalent to drinking a TaB, or a Diet Rite. Those drinks are so insubstantial that they are barely even wet.







If you are going to do anything, at least be committed to it. Vaping? Pfui. Pah. Other expostulations as required. Can you imagine Bogey turning on a second E-cig and handing it to Ingrid Bergman?

*CLICK*

"Here's looking at you, kid."

Not from "Casablanca", but hey, it's Ingrid Bergman!

Now I really despise cigarettes. They represent a vile perversion of a Noble Herb, and they stink. Walk through the Smokers Ghetto outside of any workplace or hotel, and you will see what I mean.

But I despise the abridgement of liberties even more. The very existence of The Smokers Ghetto offends. (The fact that it is fine to persecute both smokers and Christians amuses me.).   If you want to inhale toxins, then that is your own lookout. It is not my job, nor a latte-chugging weenie's business, nor the government's job to prevent your own foolishness. I enjoy cigars and pipes. What's more, they are therapeutic for me, both as anti-depressants and as a method to keep me awake on long drives. There are some municipalities on the YouEssof AY that are seeking to ban ANY smoking, even in one's own home or car. "Let's spend money we don't have to force people to stop doing something we don't like."

Now sing about "The la-and of the FREEEEEE...".

"Vaping". I would laugh if I weren't crying for what has become of our culture.

 ----------addendum----------

Since Michael opted to stir the pudding...

Here:

and here: