Cool Yule, Y'all!

I, your errant Aardvark, hope that you all had a delightful Christmas, and a fulsome Boxing Day tomorrow to you!

A Happy and Prosperous New Year as well!
---------------------
...And as the High Aardvark of Christmas, I hereby abolish the use of the term "cray-cray".
---------------------


---------------------
"I do not own the rights to this song."
Then why are you posting it online?
---------------------



----------------------
Why must you ruin burgers, pizzas and Philly cheesesteaks with Pretzel?
----------------------
Evangelical voters, if you go all one-issue and foul up the next election, it won't be because you love the Lord.
It will be because you're stupid.
----------------------
Supermarionation...IN HELL!!!



------------------------
The Lisa Frank dystopian vision: "(a) rainbow coated, sparkle laden, unicorn prancing fascist state".
Thanks, James Hatton. My mind's-eye burns, and I may never sleep again.
------------------------


--------------------
I cannot fathom the mindset that pits one set of evil-doing against another set of evil-doing, to make the second set somehow not-as-bad as the first set.
--------------------
It's STILL too soon for Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru jokes.
*snif*
--------------------
So we find that "FAIR" is a great and admirable concept.
...Until YOU are the one who needs to be fair.
--------------------
The Alabama airwaves are abuzz with talk of Gov. Bentley wanting an increase in state gasoline taxes. These are what fund road work, and we need MAJOR road and bridge-work in the state, so overall, I don't have a huge problem with it. Two things...turn Zeigler loose on ALDOT to find areas ripe for belt-tightening, and then....
Y' know the little signs all over AL secondary roads with a bike on 'em? They say "Share The Road". Fine. I'll be happy to share the road if THEY share the upkeep. Since bicyclists don't burn gasoline in their two-wheeler travels, they cannot help THAT way.
I therefore propose that over-the-road bicyclists pay an annual license fee on their bikes, which monies will go DIRECTLY into the State Highway Repair Fund (or whatever it is called). The license monies, beyond the running of the offices to sell the licenses, will go directly and ONLY to that highway upkeep fund.
You heard it here, first. If you share, share it in its entirety.
I'm a smarty every day.
-------------------
(17 December)
I will NOT be seeing "The Force Awakens" today. It is my decision. I am waiting until the "new" wears off, and I will not have to contend with a theater infested with people who have no clue as to theater etiquette and protocol.
They don't even speak Bocce.
If I chance upon a spoiler online, so be it. There are only a handful of plots, and I have seen them all.
-------------------
I await the cascade of unbelief as people huff and rant about the Syfy channel's "Childhood's End" teleflick. One fellow writes:
"Throughout, I sat in my chair utterly baffled; completely mystified why the Syfy Channel very clearly succumbed to the hackneyed, Hollywood/TV/Media obsession to change *SO MUCH* of the original story." (Jim N.)
I don't know why anyone should be surprised...

Syfy can't even spell their own genre.
--------------------
USPS.
Train your people.
Remove the mouth-breathing imbeciles.
We have received three international packages back because you sorted them to THE RETURN ADDRESS. These are printed USPS-type labels through Etsy. This is happening in Huntsville, NOT locally.

Good thing this crew wasn't working in "Miracle on 34th Street". The Santa mail would have been sent to Wedowee, AL.
----------------------
(13 December)
Okay, can we just stop with Christmas Presentism, and judging past generations for the gifts they gave and appreciated, based upon our Great Enlightened Opinions?
(See what I did there...?)
-----------------------
(11 December)
Apparently our Chinese takeout was constructed from road kill. Woke up WA-A-A-A-AY too early with...issues. Tummy is all queasy-like. Clearly a TERRISS attack upon my person. I must contact the Department of Homeland Gastronomy and have it, nay, ALL Chinese places shut down, because TERRISS.
Or, y'know, maybe I just won't go there again....
-----------------------
This is eminently satisfying:

http://www.slapkirk.com/

----------------------
Y'know, if we spent our time thinking it through rather than posting memes engineered to divide us, we might all be a lot better off.
Ju-u-u-u-st maybe....
-----------------------
I burned my Ouija board in high school.
I was so disappointed when it did not scream.
-----------------------
I believe that I want to do a series of videos reading books aloud. SHORT books. Short stories. Poetry. Like that.
Any suggestions? (I DO wish to avoid lawsuits....)

The humbug, swatted.

They're doing it wrong! Usually it's class envy and photos of riotous excess (beyond Black Friday hooliganism). Homeless people cold and hungry, because they aren't the other eleven months of the year.

I have not seen the standard media guilt-tripping this year. Not that I miss it, you understand...I just realised in the shower that a button had not been pushed yet. I await the other pointy elf-slipper to drop. We have two weeks to be told that economic disparity is EEEE-vil, and carols of peace toward men of good will are hypocritical in the extreme.

Of course I did see a picture of Mary and Joseph being turned away because they might be terrorists. That's allus a laff-riot!

If you can help a hungry person, a homeless person, a man with no shoes, a single mom needing groceries, and some Christmas joy for her kinder, make it so. Donate money or time to the local soup kitchen. As those bleeding hearts in "A Christmas Carol" said 

"(A) few of us are endeavouring to raise a fund to buy the Poor some meat and drink and means of warmth.  We choose this time, because it is a time, of all others, when Want is keenly felt, and Abundance rejoices."

However you celebrate or no, consider those for whom you have been blessed in whatever measure you have been. No guilt, no pressure. Do as you will.

And the other eleven months as well.

Merry Christmas
Happy Holidays.

Blessed days to you all.

Orbital Mechanics

I dunno if I have shared this, but your Aardvark suffers from Short Attention-Span Relationship Disorder. This is NOT equivalent to Roving-Eye Disorder.

If someone is in my immediate orbit, all is well. Regular communication, jollity, a Good Time Is Had By All. If I move away, or, perish forbid, someone else moves away, they are dead to me, practically speaking. I am not describing a jerky "How DARE they leave me?" passive-aggressive response to abandonment, no, but rather a "you are not there to push my 'attend to me' button" response. When someone dies, then they are gone. Period. I do not mourn much, or well. It took over 48 years for me to actually mourn my Momma's demise.

I do in fact view this as pathological, and I have suspicions as to its genesis, but there it is. It bugs me, but I do not wish to feign what I do not feel; neither do I want to ignore them wot I wish to keep in touch wiv.

Please be patient with me. I'm trying.

(He soitainly is...!)

Miscellany

Just gonna say this to all the whiners about Art Bell.
When you have done what he has done, and established paranormal/UFO late night talk as a viable moneymaking format, then you can whinge. Otherwise, shut your pie holes.

--------------------
Art Bell has bailed amidst gunshots, fearful women, and a dreadful fanbase.
--------------------
I like Gravity Falls better than I like Doctor Who.
There. I said it.
--------------------
Apparently our Chinese takeout was constructed from road kill. Woke up WA-A-A-A-AY too early with...issues. Tummy is all queasy-like. Clearly a TERRISS attack upon my person. I must contact the Department of Homeland Gastronomy and have it, nay, ALL Chinese places shut down, because TERRISS.
Or, y'know, maybe I just won't go there again....
--------------------
Why exactly does each episode of Space:1999 feel like two-and-a-half hours?



--------------------------
Dear, dear meme-posting believers:
"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap." (Galatians 6:7)
--------------------------
This, from C.H. Spurgeon's FB page.
All that, and he loved cigars, too!



--------------------------
Gravity Falls is just the best thing EVER.
Except for pie...maybe....
--------------------------
Y'know, if we spent our time thinking it through rather than posting memes engineered to divide us, we might all be a lot better off.
Ju-u-u-u-st maybe....
---------------------------
I burned my Ouija board in high school.
I was so disappointed when it did not scream.
---------------------------
I believe that I want to do a series of videos reading books aloud. SHORT books. Short stories. Poetry. Like that.
Any suggestions? (I DO wish to avoid lawsuits....)

Happy Sunday!

Flat Earthers, ahoy!

Someone PLEASE tell me that the whole flat-earth thing is an Onion-type gag.
Please.

------------------

REALLY??
The morning after the show aired in the UK, and you are blathering about key plot points?!
"Who" fandom...I'm done.

Thoughtless, selfish louts.

------------------

Noel and I discussed Needful Things to watch this Christmas (that means AFTER Thanksgiving, BTW).
It's a Wonderful Life
Scrooge (the '70s musical)
Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol
A Claymation Christmas

What are must-sees in your opinion?

-------------------

In other news...I want a SPECTRE wedding band.

-------------------

A reminder:
Passive Aggressive is not found in the list of the fruit of the Spirit.
Lesson learned: You cannot write reasonably in the face of polemic.

-------------------



-------------------

OK. Everyone who is accusing those of us with...concerns...over the importing of "refugees", most of whom are military-age men, not mothers wi' wee bairns, it's time to put up.
How many are you going to invite into your home? How many will you foster with your family?
When you do that, then I'll take your accusations of hypocrisy, and of not caring for my fellow man a little more seriously.

-------------------

Let me try it this way. It doesn't matter what group of needy we talk about..."refugees", homeless, veterans. You who would be the Arbiters of Charity and Goodwill, lead the way.

-------------------

All righty, then.
I have been thinking. It's OK. It's all good. Bring 'em in. Bring 'em ALL in. If everything goes ginger- peachy, well, I'll repent in dust and ashes and say "Boy! I sure had THAT one wrong.".
But if we become targets, and the beginning of the Caliphate West rears its head, well then, I will surely expect the same courtesies from you.

I believe in charity, and aid, and Helping the Other Guy. I also believe in looking out for my own people, my own nation.
I'm done.Bring on the next flail-fest.

-------------------

It doesn't matter if you are an ardent religious person, or an unbeliever, a conservative, or a progressive...
If you have to make up stories or events to support your "side", then you a liar, and the truth is not in you, nor in your issue du jour.
--------------------

All right people, just STOP slinging Matthew 25 around at people who are leery of bringing refugees of whatever stripe into the continental US. Jesus was teaching of the individual's responsibility to his neighbor (and Jesus was talking "neighbor", as in Year One...someone who lives close at hand; someone with whom you have to do.) He was not establishing National Public Policy, because, as He proclaims, "My Kingdom is not of this world.".
So stop casting Jesus as a Republican or Democrat, or suggesting that Jesus would Feel the Bern. The transformation He provides is first and foremost individual, personal. Through many individual redemptions, the society can ultimately be transformed, being filled with the redeemed.
Submit to His Lordship, or shut up. Outside of His Lordship, one has no part in His Kingdom, or the Gospel.

---------------------

Here is a picture I set up (directed?) at the Classic Movie Monstercon years ago.
Rather proud of this, really....



----------------------