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Saturday, August 18, 2012



There are things that One Knows Not To Do. Trying to fly from the roof of your house. Saying to an Army Ranger "You wanna GO ?".

Eating a coliseum hot dog.

Your Aardvark is a weiner snob. The only hot doggish things allowed in Chez 'Vark are Nathan's, but the siren song of blood sugar bottoming out makes rational thought difficult. It was precisely as dreadful as it sounds, evoking the '50s American fear of seasoning that Lileks writes of so ably. (I recommend "Meat, meat, meat" for starters.)

But this sends me wobbling to other things on my mind. Things that Annoy.

Loki fangirls.

Cosplayers almost wearing costumes (mileage may vary).

Facebook "discussions"

Steakhouses that overseason their meat. I know why they did that in the Middle Ages. Makes me suspicious.

Teenage Alien Ninja Turtles (Thanks, Michael Bey)

Electronic Monopoly

Being unable to speak my mind, because it would be completely misunderstood, miscategorized, and I would be given a loathsome label, because people do not think, or present cogent arguments, but rather polemicize, offering up emotional fallacies and unfounded assertions instead.

The comics industry dying a slow, painful death, largely self-inflicted.

Warhammer

There may be more....

4 comments:

Michael W said...

@Aardvark --- "Eating a coliseum hot dog."

Years ago I was at work and was absolutely starving. I went up to the floor where the vending machines were and, in one of the machines, I found what was labled a "Polish Sausage". Salivating like a man possessed I purchased it, popped it into the microwave for a bit and promptly ate it.

I look back at that now as being in the top five on my "Stupidest Things I Ever Did" list. Spent the rest of that day thinking I was absolutely going to die! It felt as if a full-blown kaiju battle was being waged within my digestive system. Oy!



The Aardvark said...

Y' see, I should have known better, because I once ate a 7/11 hot dog. With squirty chili and squirty cheese.

This is proof that MPAI. Even I.

Michael W said...

@Aardvark --- "I once ate a 7/11 hot dog."

Whoa Nelly! Now I will eat convenience store fried chicken (I'm particularly enamored of the kind which is sold at an Exxon down the road). I will eat convenience store taquitos and even the egg rolls. But the hot dogs??? With that chili and that cheese? I hope to the Almightly I never get that hungry.

Jay said...

Have had very few problems with the "dogs" at the UDF (United Dairy Farmers) convenience store a few blocks from where I live.

Chedderwurst ... mmmmmmmm!